Gratitude - Pria's Ponderings

All is Well

Finding Meaning, Gratitude, Musing on Death, Musings, Outlook, Philosophy, Spirituality Comments Off

Nov 072016

In my calmest and most clarified moments, I see…that all is well. Regardless of the choices made and paths taken, in the end, no matter what, all will be well. As we near our end, there is not much that will matter or concern us. We must let go of all there was and choose peace with all there is and is not. What other options would we choose? Would we consider ending our lives in anger, regret, remorse, or grief?

None of us were given manuals on how to live our lives. Day by day, we try to learn about ourselves and how to care for and honor ourselves. How can we make a judgment call of what is good or bad for someone? We do not know all there is about life. We do not know from that which we came and we do not know where we will go. All we have is the time allowed and the paths in front of us. We determine the paths chosen and how gracefully we can walk on them.

All we can do is just be. Be in the moment fully. That is all we have at any given moment. We can not judge these moments. They just are. Each moment is a gift to be mindful of, respect, and cherish. Our moments savored are nourishing rain drops for our soul. Our enriched soul can then come forth to awaken, be seen, heard, and honored. Awakened souls united can enrich the world.

We can not decide or determine how long we are here or have others in our life or in this world. What are they trying to teach us about ourselves? What do we learn, understand, respect and honor about ourselves through our relationships? They are there for us to find ourselves. Others must be allowed to find their own paths towards the directions they seek. Their paths and journeys belong to them. We can not trespass on their paths, but patiently and respectfully hope to be invited to share their journeys as we allow them the privilege to share in ours.

Most of life is beyond our control. We must simply be and feel all that we are and can become. Being open to our heart, intuition and soul can allow us to accept, acknowledge and allow all there is…to meet, recognize and embrace our authentic self. In the end, it is our true self we will be with.

Encouragement from Raleigh to Aurora

Attitude, Causes, Finding balance, Finding Meaning, Finding Purpose, Gratitude, Musing on Death, Philosophy Comments Off

Aug 082012

As an employee of the city of Aurora in CO, my husband has come across lots of words of sympathy and encouragement from around the world. Following is an encouraging letter from the city of Raleigh to the city of Aurora following the recent shooting.

Subject: Words of Encouragement from Raleigh, NC

Yesterday afternoon I attended a matinee viewing of The Dark Knight Rises, the final movie in the Batman trilogy; the unfortunate setting for the tragic act of violence during the movie’s midnight premier in your city, Aurora, Colorado. I, like so many others, have been following the unfolding of the theatre shooting and have felt a pull of singularity similar to the immediate reaction of patriotism that followed in the wake of 9/11. Sharing in the horror and impact of the intent and actions of one man I became immediately aware of my own fleeting life upon entering my local theatre. As the previews began my eyes searched for the emergency exits, and I took particular notice of every person who entered the room (all ten of them at that early time of day). During the first few minutes of the movie a rattling of gunfire on the screen made me alert and agitated, echoing the tragic testimonies shared of an audience who quickly diverted their attention from fantasy to reality in an effort to save and protect loved ones and themselves. I thought to myself, should I have come? But as the plot continued I became enraptured by the villainous mind of Bain, the sheer hopelessness of Gotham City, and the contemplative genius of Bob Kane on the relationship between good and evil in our worlds: fiction and reality alike. As the credits rolled up from the bottom of the screen at the conclusion of the movie, I sat recovering from being emotionally invested in the outcome of the plot and reflecting upon the men and women who are struggling to find solace and understanding in the aftermath of the Aurora tragedy. The truth is the movie made me think only of Aurora. The character Bruce Wayne repeatedly remarks on his identity being only a suit that anyone can wear. In an epic moment of dialogue during the plot the audience is reminded that a hero can be found in a single moment, “A hero can be anyone, even a man doing something as simple and reassuring as putting a coat around a young boy’s shoulders to let him know the world hasn’t ended (Bruce Wayne as Batman).” Although it is tempting to idolize the fictional Batman as the ultimate hero, there is a resounding distinction between the heroes of fiction and the heroes of our reality. The men, women and children who are picking up the aftermath of the Aurora tragedy are the heroes of our present day. Aurora has a nation of support surrounding them, cheering “rise!” as we watch a community climb out of the darkness of such tragedy. Aurora, I stand with a nation that is shouting cheers full of hope for you, that this tragedy will make you stronger as you search for answers, struggle with prayers, and learn the art of survival that follows great loss. Jonathan Blunk, Alexander Boik, Jesse Childress, Gordon Cowden, Jessica Ghawi, John Larimer, Matt MacQuinn, Micayla Medek, Veronica Moser-Sullivan, Alex Sullivan, Alexander C. Teves, and Rebecca Wingo are names engraved on my heart.

I could not help but to think of Aurora and the victims of that horrible night, and know that an entire nation is doing the same, as these words are echoed in theatres across the world, “I see a beautiful city and a brilliant people rising from this abyss. I see the lives for which I lay down my life, peaceful, useful, prosperous and happy. I see that I hold a sanctuary in their hearts, and in the hearts of their descendants, generations hence. It is a far, far better thing that I do, that I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.” Aurora, this is a moment for heroes, and we are all looking at you: a beautiful city, a brilliant people, a community that will rise from this abyss.

Sincerely,

Raleigh, NC.

Sad day for CO

Finding Meaning, Gratitude, Loss, Outlook, Philosophy, Spirituality, Thoughts 1 Response »

Jul 202012

I along with fellow Colorado residents woke up this morning to the sad news of another shooting. I’m sure many that are at least as old as me were transported to that day when there was breaking news of Columbine. My now 14 year-old teen was an infant as I, a new mom then, was trying to reconcile the world my child was born into…He of course does not remember that day as he connects with fellow teens on what has occurred today. I wonder what they are saying and how they comfort one another with their limited time on this planet. I’m not certain how the rest of us console one another.

I don’t know what experience in this world teaches us about these events. It is particularly hard to hear and understand when the victims are children. In this case, even a three-month old. Spiritually and as a mom, this is particularly difficult. I’m sure all moms would want to hug and hold this child’s mom along with the moms of the other children, such as a six year-old and fourteen year-old (that could have been my teen). One victim had survived a previous shooting. She had a strange feeling and had walked out of a mall just before the shooting.

A common difficult feeling most of us feel during times like these is that of helplessness. In this case, it occurred at midnight, when most of us were sleeping. It was the first thing I heard about when barely awake, before my first cup of coffee. But life had to go on, we had to get ready for work and get our daughter ready for daycare. As the day wore on, we learned more. The children that lost lives, from 3 months to 14 years. My child’s beloved daycare teacher’s husband was there, covering a teen boy with his body to shield him. A City of Aurora employee, my spouse can see the theater from his building at the Aurora Municipal Center. This tragedy will impact him and his colleagues even more. I imagine there would be permanent changes to their work culture and how they view their jobs and city.

It is strange to think I was just at the Aurora Municipal Center the previous weekend with our daughter to attend the city’s kid festival, “Kidspree,” where my husband was volunteering. There was a huge turn-out from Aurora and the focus was on innocence and fun for the kids. Some Aurora police officers were there, on their bikes, with not much to do but enjoy the event. Kids were on the karaoke machine back to back, belting out songs including those from Adele.

One of the thoughts that comes next for most us is regarding what, if anything, we can do. From a big picture, it is challenging. How can such a tragedy be prevented? Are the violent movies to blame? Is there inadequate or not enough mental health services? How and why did this student get to this stage? Is this another case of a “lost” boy as mentioned during Columbine? Are we not taking adequate care of some of our boys so they can grow up to be caring and responsible members of society? These are tough, complicated questions with probable tough, complicated answers. At the same time, such questions and others should be asked and answers should be sought, however complicated they may be.

In the meantime, there are pragmatic, immediate actions that can be done to help if desired. The American Red Cross Mile High Chapter is seeking donations to help the families displaced or hurt by this violence. The Bonfils Blood Center is requesting donations of O-Negative and A-Negative blood to help them restore their bank following the numerous surgeries related to injuries sustained during the shooting.

This tragedy reminds us to hold our loved ones close, count our blessings, and to be appreciative of our fragile time here.

Managing Stress

Attitude, Finding balance, Gratitude, Happiness, Humor, Outlook, Philosophy, Self-Care 1 Response »

Apr 242011

Think about a relaxing waterfall.

Are you highly stressed or anxious? Stress can wreak havoc on our health in many ways. Here are some ways to manage it:

Keep Perspective

It is important to keep perspective. When you feel up, keep notes. When you feel down, take notes. When you are down, read these notes to see how you got through it, and more importantly, that you did get through it.

When you are up, enjoy it, and know that you may go down…Don’t take life too seriously! Remember that the only thing that remains constant is change, “this too shall pass.”

Laugh

Maintain a sense of humor and try to find something funny in everyday life. Be around people that make you laugh. Watch shows that make you laugh. Find as many ways as possible to laugh as much as you can daily.

Journal

Work through issues by writing down what is blocking you from the direction you want to go. Is it you or external events? What is going well? What are you grateful for? Make a list of what you want in all areas of your life. Diagram the different areas – mental, physical, emotional, spiritual. Fill in the boxes with what is working. Which block seems more empty? That area needs attention.

Develop a support system

Ensure you have adequate support to help you when times are tough. Be comfortable with utilizing professional support including life coaches in addition to friends. Even pets can be a source of comfort.

Loss and Gain

Attitude, Finding balance, Finding Meaning, Gratitude, Outlook, Personal Growth, Philosophy Comments Off

Mar 312011

My sleeping gain

Lately, I’ve had to come to terms with the idea of loss more – something I think I’ve had to deal with in varying degrees with some challenging peaks. It got to an overwhelming point and I had to remind myself how I got to the other “normal” side before.

Loss is something we deal with everyday at different levels. Everyday, our bodies are 1 day older and we gradually have to let go of a previous notion of what we could expect. We become one day older and we have to let go of the previous day in order to embrace a new day and all that it offers.

One aspect of loss is that it is often one side of a coin. If we can manage to look enough, we can sometimes see the gain on the other side. I experienced this gain as I kissed my smiling toddler before she went to slept. This miraculous creature was in my life now and had not been there only two short years ago. It is true that when one door is shut, another often opens, even if we have to be patient and wait for it or try to have enough awareness to notice it.

The science of happiness

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Apr 302010

Maya being the epitomy of happiness at Easter

According to a feature on The Today Show, 50% of how happy we feel is based on genetics. We can control the other half. There is a level of hard-wiring in terms of how happy we feel, but we can work around it.

Perspective, attitude, and optimism matters. There are ways to be more optimistic and studies have shown that optimists are much happier. They appreciate what they have and don’t think about what they don’t have.

Tips on being happy

5 random acts of kindness per week
keep a gratitude journal – focusing on what you are thankful for keeps you in that positive space
forgive – it releases you from a psychological imprisonment
write someone a thank-you letter – pen to paper, not email. The process of thanking someone makes a difference.
getting enough sleep
having fun
think about what’s true for you, e.g. don’t force yourself to find all your happiness from motherhood if that is not true for you.
make your bed! There is something about the tangible act that helps people feel there is order in their lives and that they are starting their day right. I have been trying to tell my husband and son this! I am a stickler about a bed being made first thing.
strong relationships – joining a group, throwing a party, and just showing up.

Source: The Today Show, 4/30/10